Wastrel, n.

A wasteful person.

I have been a wastrel in my life many times. Far too many to count. I’m guilty of taking an extra long nap during a beautiful day, of sleeping in when there is work to do, and letting my friendships fall by the wayside because I was too busy or caught up in the thoughts in my head.

I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about my energy levels, what interactions cost me, and what energizes and reinvigorates me. I’ve come to the realization that I engage in a lot of activities that make me disengage. These aren’t moments when I disengage to recharge, but when I check out as an avoidance strategy. I believe we all do this to a certain extent. For some of us, it is when we watch TV, or make dinner. Sometimes I will mentally vacate while going on a run, but this doesn’t make me feel like a wastrel. Instead, it is when I fall sleep because I’m too depleted to put forth the energy it takes to be social, thankful, or thoughtful. I’m guilty of being absent when I watch TV or when I’m in a group of friends, and thankfully, I have a few friends who will point out when I’ve gone into the ether with my thoughts, and they help me feel like less of a wastrel. But this project is helping me to be more engaged and appreciative, and to be less wasteful and careless with how I expend my energy. So, while I know I will still have my wastrel moments, I can confidently say I’m doing everything I can to remove this as a descriptor for myself, even though it can be so easy to disappear into the recesses of my brain and stare blankly ahead.

This entry was published on April 10, 2012 at 2:40 pm. It’s filed under 30 New Words and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

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